“Just be yourself!”
It’s a phrase we hear a lot on TV, and it makes me squirm. In cartoons especially, it serves as a one-and-done lesson, at which point the show can move on to other stock morals. But self-acceptance takes so much longer than 11 minutes, and no show has ever portrayed the struggle as accurately as Steven Universe does through its character Amethyst.
Amethyst has it tough. She wasn’t born, but made — a product of a massive invasion of Earth, during which the imperial alien Gems of Homeworld used perverse measures that sucked nutrients out of the soil to create more of their kind as warriors. The process sapped the Earth’s resources, and was the catalyst for an all-out Gem war between Homeworld and a group of rebellious Crystal Gems led by Rose Quartz. Amethyst’s place in the conflict is admittedly awkward: her creation was harmful and 100-percent not her own choice, and she’s also the runt of her litter.
When the series begins, Amethyst opposes the Homeworld Gems and fights with the remaining Crystal Gems to protect the planet Earth. This brings up some…mixed feelings. When her teammates say, “A very long time ago, Gems tried to do something very bad,” what she hears is, “You shouldn’t exist.”
The episode “On the Run” reveals much of her backstory. As she emotionally tells Pearl in a heated moment that derails into a brief fight: “I’m not going to let you stand there and remind me of everything I hate about myself. I never asked for it to be this way. I never asked to be made.” For Amethyst, her entire being is under attack. It’s personal.
Over the course of the show, Amethyst holds herself in comparison to her fellow Gems. The most striking example is in “Reformed,” when she “poofs” — her physical Gem form gets destroyed — and she intentionally reforms as a caricature of Pearl while on a mission with Steven and Garnet.
Garnet is not pleased. This is not a temporary shape-shift, like Amethyst’s pro-wrestling alter-ego, Purple Puma. Her reformed body is a semi-permanent projection of her gem and who she is — a neutral state. By taking the shape of her teammate, she’s both airing and literally disguising her desire for affirmation.
She wants to be loved. We all do.
Unsurprisingly, love and support are key notes in the series’ refrain. Pearl does listen to Amethyst, and lets her know that she’s valued. Garnet does affirm her final reformation, the one that took uncomfortable self-reflection to unironically express her identity.
“It’s perfect,” Garnet says.
“Eh, whatevs. It’s just what feels right,” Amethyst responds.
As Garnet points out, “just what feels right” is perfect. “On the Run” and “Reformed” are not the last episodes that explore Amethyst’s view of herself. That’s the difference between Steven Universe and other shows: it demonstrates self-worth as a process, not a moral. It presents emotional insecurity as a complex struggle, not an intrinsic failing. And it models a combination of working with loved ones and working with oneself as a path out of self-loathing. At the end of “Reformed,” Steven, Garnet, and Pearl all wrap the Amethyst’s newest physical manifestation in a giant hug.
“Knock it off!” she protests, just as Garnet joins in on the love fest.
“No,” Steven insists. “It’s hug time.”
“Ugh, this is so dumb,” Amethyst says, but she smiles and sighs contentedly all the same. This was a positive step.
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