A Murder Most Awesome: The 5 Best Brock Samson Kills

Rating the top five kills of the Venture family’s mullet-headed murder machine, Brock Samson.

Brock Samson, the Murderist Extraordinaire, has killed many, many people (and robots, and monsters) during his time protecting the Venture family. His penchant for violence is well documented: he once ripped out a man’s eyes and made him dance like a marionette by his optic nerve.

But while the man sometimes known simply as “Super Kill Guy” has put many to bed for good with his patented Bowie knife, some of his slayings are just a league above the rest. Here are Brock Samson’s top five kills. And yes, they’re in order.

HONORABLE MENTION:

This is one of Brock’s most iconic moments. However, he didn’t kill the Guild agent. Brock definitely didn’t get the kidney.

5. Seeing Ghosts

Arising from the briny depths of the sea, Brock single-handedly (that’s a pun) put down the ghost of Major Tom. Brock kills a ghost and doesn’t even flinch.

4. Farewell, Führer

While not the most visually impressive kill, Brock got to kill Hitler. That’s pretty awesome. Who doesn’t have “kill Hitler” on their bucket list?

3. Poor Speedy

The death of Speedy, one of the only named henchmen serving The Monarch, illustrates why you don’t mess with Brock’s family. Even while unconscious, Brock strangled poor Speedy to death.

2. Joy Ride

Following the death of Speedy, Brock gets his revenge on the Fluttering Horde. Adrienne, Brock’s trusty car, mows down dozens of butterflies and doesn’t even get a dent.

1. Jaws Doesn’t Stand a Chance

This is the most glorious Brock Samson kill. Lassoed by one of the greatest assassins in the world, Brock wrestles a shark, breaks free and then decapitates the assassin WITH A SHARK. Only one man could accomplish such a feat of murder.

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