I have been thinking about looking at Eric with Tommy Lee Jones Face a lot this week.
I hate rude behavior in a man, Eric. I won’t tolerate it. All the ad hominem, the parodic fan art. But I did say you could run the site while I was out of state for two weeks, and I guess this’ll teach me to be careful about what I promise in the future.
I’ll admit, O readers, losers, and haters, that I forgot how determined Eric can get, once an idea takes root—although I won’t be making that mistake again. But here’s the thing: I’ve probably only recommended two live-action shows to my scheming co-editor in my entire life. One I’ve begged him to binge since we were sophomores in college, the other since two years after that. He’s watched neither. By my count, that makes my ratio better than his.
Now, it’s true that what’s good for me may not be good for the weak minded. I can’t promise Eric that these shows will do the voodoo they did on me the same way on him. But I’m just tryin’ to keep everything in balance, my boy—and give you more to watch, while I keep running away from the ever-increasing mountain of shows about real people. You do more work than you got to, so it’s my obligation to do less.
Eric, I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don’t plan it. Don’t wait for it. Just let it happen. You may have no idea where this will lead you, but I have a definite feeling it will be a place both wonderful and strange. Two, in fact: Twin Peaks, Washington, and Lonesome Dove, Texas. And now that I think of it, at least a few more along the ol’ cowboy way.
But really, Eric. Both of the shows I’ve recommended have been around longer than any of the shows y’all have come at my top for this week. Each has one of the greatest musical scores of all time—especially the themes. Each is critically acclaimed, exquisitely shot, and cinematically significant. Each is in the IMDB Top 100 TV shows list. And Lonesome Dove is only six hours long in total!
Not convinced? Then try this: cumulatively, the show’s casts include Tommy Lee Jones, Robert Duvall, Diane Lane, Danny Glover, Steve Buscemi, Chris Cooper, Anjelica Huston, Kyle MacLachlan, Lara Flynn Boyle, David Duchovny, David Lynch, Heather Graham, Billy Zane, Ray Wise, West Side Story alums Russ Tamblyn and Richard Beymer, and Carrie alum Piper Laurie. And those are just the big ones! Plus, just look at this:
I understand that coincidence and fate figure largely in our lives, but not having seen these shows and still having the gall to dedicate an entire package to my live-action failures? That’s deliberate, and it’s churlish. It just won’t do.
Now, Eric, while I will admit to a certain cynicism, the fact is that I am a naysayer and hatchetman in the fight against violence — even the editorial kind. Normally, I reject absolutely revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method… is love.
But I’ve realized something. #JohnWithTheWind, too, was a labor of love. Sick, twisted, ornery love, but love nonetheless. I think I’ll repay the favor in kind someday.
But until then? By god, Eric. It’s been one hell of a party.
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